By Paul V.

Congrats to director Sophia Coppola. The Marie Antoinette auteur gave birth to a baby girl named Romy in Paris this month. The father is her boyfriend Thomas Mars, singer of the French band Phoenix.

Note to Jessica Simpson: Bitch, if you’re booked to sing “9 To 5” at a televised Dolly Parton tribute, learn the friggin’ words before you go onstage. Oh, and fire your stylist, while you’re at it.

Damon Albarn’s new band, The Good, The Bad and The Queen, will play a live show this week in London that will be broadcast online via their MySpace page.

Speaking of London—and a queen—our gal Courtney Love is thinking of moving to the U.K. She recently appeared on a Brit TV show, dolled up like Queen Liz herself, smoking a fag (the tobacco kind). Love’s much-anticipated new disc drops soon, and she recently cited PJ Harvey’s Rid Of Me CD over her late husband’s Nevermind as one of the most influential discs of the ‘90s. It’s also rumored that Courtney seems to be on a celebrity stalking kick, and that her first victim was actor Russell Crowe. You can follow Courtney’s recovery—and her return to the studio—in her VH1 special that airs on Dec. 16.

In celeb breakup news, Good Charlotte’s Joel Madden and Hillary Duff are splitsville, ‘N Sync’s Lance Bass and Reichen Lehmkuhl are now kaput, and Eddie Murphy has reportedly ditched former Spice Girl, Melanie Brown. The Dreamgirls actor just revealed on a Dutch TV show that he’s not sure if the child Brown is carrying is actually his. Murphy has quickly moved on, and is now “dating” Tracey Edmonds, ex-wife of Babyface. I didn’t know she had a penis.

Stand back, stand back, ‘cuz there’s a rumor that Lindsay Lohan is being considered for the lead in an upcoming biopic on singer Steve Nicks. Lohan will produce, act and sing (ouch) in the flick and is hoping to cast Jared Leto as Lindsey Buckingham, Nicks’ collaborator/boyfriend during the ‘70s.

And finally, we send out a plea to Britney Spears: For God’s sake, woman, stop traipsing around with Paris Hilton, and wear some damn panties when you go out in public! And if you don’t, then please Krazy Glue your inner thighs together so we will never, ever have to suffer through another world-tour of your shaved, pink canoe cooch and C-section scar!