By John Hobbs

Thursday, June 14

Game On

The Wall Las Memorias is bringing some South American sizzle to L.A. tonight with its Summer Carnaval 2007. The Brazilian bash will feature seven casino tables and a raffle, which could leave you walking away a big winner. But if Lady Luck isn’t on your side, you still win with the bounty of food, drink and entertainment lined up for the benefit. $60. 7 p.m. Gauchos Village, 411 N. Brand Blvd., Glendale. www.thewalllasmemorias.org

Electric Youth

The Arena is ground zero for the 18-and-over pulsating pop party Tiger Heat with DJ Ray Rhodes. $8 cover. Every Thursday, 9:30 p.m.-2 a.m. Hollywood Arena, 6655 Santa Monica Blvd., Hlywd. www.clubtigerheat.com

Smack Attack

Gulp, don’t sip the cocktails served up tall, cold and free for five minutes each hour at Smack, the world’s fastest open bar. DJ Josh Peace provides the eclectic musical soundtrack to this boisterous party. Every Thursday. Free. 9 p.m. O-Bar, 8279 Santa Monica Blvd., W. Hlywd. www.tomwhitmanprsents.com

Can You Feel the Heat?

Ladies—in the mood for some Heat? Check out here lounge’s Thursday night party featuring loads of luscious lesbians and DJ Josh Peace dropping the illest mixes of your favorite hip-hop, Latin dance and reggaeton songs. 696 Robertson Blvd., W. Hlywd. www.herelounge.com

The Wetter the Better

Get an eyeful at Thursday night’s Wet-and-Wild Shorts Contest. Winner takes home $100—and most likely a few phone numbers. Eagle L.A., 4219 Santa Monica Blvd., L.A. (323) 669-9472 or www.eaglela.com

Friday, June 15

The Comeback

After the death of handler Wayland Flowers forced Madame from the spotlight back in the late 1980s, many wondered whether the sassy puppet’s star had burned out altogether. Though we can only imagine what she did during her self-imposed hiatus—serious soul-searching, a stint in rehab, a series of lounge shows at local dive bars—after all these years, the bitch is back. Join Madame alongside her new handler, Joe Kovacs at the M Bar for Comeback From A Broad!. $25. Friday, June 15, at 8 p.m., Saturday, June 16, at 10 p.m. 1253 N. Vine St., Hlywd. www.madameandme.com

Skin Is In

Skin is in at MJ’s bar every Friday night as Tattoo Chris and Anthony Lopez bring you a sexy dance party with hot mixes provided by DJ Mike. 9 p.m.-2 a.m. 2810 Hyperion Ave., Silver Lake. www.mjsbar.com

Weekly Bible Study It Is Not

Join Tom Whitman for Drunk and Horny, West Hollywood’s sexy Friday night party at Fubar where DJ Josh Peace keeps the party bumpin’ with his hot mix of dirty pop, trashy house and party music. Free. 9 p.m.-2 a.m. 7994 Santa Monica Blvd., W. Hlywd. www.tomwhitmanpresents.com

Pull Over

You won’t find any 18-wheelers, blue-plate specials or squawking CB radios at this Truck Stop—just a bunch of hotties dancing on the bar to the tunes of DJ Herrick Hell. Every Friday. here lounge, 696 N. Robertson Blvd., W. Hlywd. www.herelounge.com

Saturday, June 16

Stars and Pipes

They say the neon lights are bright on Broadway, but tonight, you can enjoy your Broadway experience whilst relaxing beneath an enormous canopy of stars as the Ford Amphitheatre presents Broadway Babies, a sensational evening of song starring Karen Morrow, Mimi Hines, Marilyn Maye and many others. $38. 8 p.m. 2580 Cahuenga Blvd. East, Hlywd. www.fordtheatres.org

Moving Pictures

If a picture is worth a thousand words, then prepare yourself—you’re in for one helluva story as Chuck Stallard presents Silence=Death: Los Angeles AIDS Activism 1987-2007, an inspiring exhibit chronicling 20 years of activism. Free. Tuesday-Saturday, 11 a.m.-5 p.m. through July 21. Drkrm. Gallery, 2121 San Fernando Rd., Suite 3, L.A.. www.drkrm.com

Forget Pink’s

Head over to Dragonfly tonight to check out Mario Diaz’s wildly popular Hot Dog, which is plumper, juicier and meatier than ever—and you won’t even have to worry about all those nasty nitrates. $3 drinks from 10-11 p.m. 6510 Santa Monica Blvd., Hlywd. www.clubhotdog.com

Sunday, June 17

Size Matters

Whoever said size doesn’t matter hasn’t been to here lounge on Sunday nights for the big DJs, big drinks and big fun at Size. Join some of the city’s most smokin’ DJs at this week’s soiree. 696 N. Robertson Blvd., W. Hlywd. www.tomwhitmanpresents.com

Big Momma’s House

It may be God’s house, but for the next three Sundays the WeHo Church will feel more like Momma’s house as the drag diva throws a holy ghost party, bringing with her Peterson Toscano, who will discuss the tragedies of the ex-gay movement (it’ll be funny) on June 24, and Sesame Street puppeteer Leslie Carrara-Rudolph and Lolly on July 1. Why wasn’t church this fun when we were kids? 11 a.m. 916 N. Formosa Ave., W. Hlywd. www.wehochurch.com

Monday, June 18

Life in Cartoon Motion

Life takes a decidedly cartoon turn at the Antebellum Gallery, where Toonfetish!, a brand new exhibit featuring gay erotic comics and illustrated art, is on display Wednesdays-Saturdays, through July 13. 1643 N. Las Palmas Ave., Hlywd. www.antebellum.us.ms

Tuesday, June 19

High-Octane Hangout

Looking to get your party on in the 818? Check out Club Fuel with its Twisted Tuesdays, Re-Fuel Thursdays, Commando Saturdays and Beer Bust Sundays. 11608 Ventura Blvd., Studio City. www.clubfuel.us

Wednesday, June 20

Looking Fierce or Fiercely Looking

Club Girl Talk at Encounters in Pasadena offers transgenders, cross dressers and their admirers a night to mingle while DJ Tony spins top 40 and dance hits into the night. No Cover. 203 Sierra Madre Blvd., Pasadena. www.encountersnightclub.com

Go Metro

Get over the hump with Club Metro at Ultra Suede as DJ Ben drops the hottest hip-hop, reggaeton and R&B beats, and L.A.’s hottest go-go dancers shake their stuff. Free with guest list before 11 p.m. $7 otherwise. Ultra Suede, 661 N. Robertson Blvd., W. Hlywd. (323) 769-6333

Sing Out, Louise

What better way to get over the mid-week hump than guzzling two-for-one drinks at Fiesta Cantina and captivating your friends with your own rockin’ renditions of old karaoke standards? Karaoke with Kenny, 10:30 p.m.-1:45 a.m. 8851 Santa Monica Blvd., W. Hlywd. www.karaokewithkenny.com

Set ‘em Up and Knock ‘em Down

Half-price specials on some of the best-tasting cocktails in West Hollywood? We’re there. Don’t miss Wednesday nights at East/West Lounge with its Premium blend of two-for-one drink specials running from 9-10 p.m. and again from midnight to 1 a.m. 8851 Santa Monica Blvd., W. Hlywd. www.eastwestlounge.com

Thursday, June 21

Book ‘em

Meet Armistead Maupin tonight at Skylight Books as the author of Tales from the City and The Night Listener drops in on the Silver Lake bookstore to sign copies of his latest work, Michael Tolliver Lives. 7:30 p.m. Skylight Books, 1818 N. Vermont Ave., L.A. www.skylightbooks.com

Night at the Museum

The L.A. County Museum of Art will be jumping tonight as local sensations Ima Robot, the Rebirth and DJ Steve Aoki turn it out for the opening night of ArtScape, a weekend-long celebration including special installations, book signings and even a free screening of John Waters’ Hairspray. Free. Opening

Night Reception: 7 p.m.-3 a.m. LACMA, 5905 Wilshire Blvd., L.A. www.lacma.org

In the Land of Women

Get your weekend started early with Platinum at East/West Lounge, bringing the sexiest birds out for a sophisticated Sapphic soiree. 8851 Santa Monica Blvd., W. Hlywd. www.eastwestlounge.com

Friday, June 22

People Are Talking

Los Angeles’ cabaret crowd is abuzz over Upright Cabaret, a popular night of music, taking place the second and fourth Friday each month at La Boheme. Don’t miss the show that Broadway-

World.com says “wows audiences with its unique and fanciful take on the cabaret clubs typically found in Manhattan. Television stars, check… Broadway players, check… fresh talent, check… priceless fun, always.” $15. 9 p.m. 8400 Santa Monica Blvd., W. Hlywd. www.uprightcabaret.com

Saturday, June 23

Wild Thing

If you don’t yet know the name Elvira Kurt, it’s only a matter of time because this funny lady’s star is on the rise. The Hungarian-born comedienne, who, true to lesbian comedienne form, hosted her own talk show, Comedy Central’s PopCultured with Elvira Kurt, and who currently hosts Logo’s hit reality show, First Comes Love, is hitting the Renberg to film her latest comedy special, Elvira Kurt: Raised in the Wild. By Hungarians, tonight at 8 p.m. $20. 1125 N. McCadden Pl., L.A. www.lagaycenter.org/boxoffice

Sisters With Voices

Let Vox Femina sweep you away in a swell of music as the all-female choir presents Hot Women, Cool Jazz tonight with special guest artist Suede. $25 in advance, $30 at the door. Saturday, June 23, at 8 p.m., Sunday, June 24, at 4 p.m. Zipper Concert Hall, 200 S. Grand Ave., L.A. www.voxfeminala.org

On the BLock

Get your hands on some great art tonight as the L.A. Gay and Lesbian Center rolls out its Out Auction 2007. The swanky soiree, taking place at the Pacific Design Center, will place sketches, paintings, sculptures and more on the auction block for the highest bidder. Don’t be bashful with your bids: All proceeds benefit the Gay and Lesbian Center. $65. 6-10 p.m. 8687 Melrose Ave., W. Hlywd. www.outauction.org

Go Commando

Whatever your feelings are about the Iraq mess, few would argue the need to support our troops. What better way than by heading over to Club Fuel’s Military Night to appreciate—and perhaps take home—a sexy sailor, hot army dude or a buff Navy seal? No cover. Every Saturday. 11608 Ventura Blvd., Studio City. www.clubfuel.us

So Effing Popular

Anybody who’s anybody will be at Popular—winner of the 2006 WeHo Award for best nightclub event—on Saturdays, dancing to the pop music, ogling the cute go-go boys and girls and cashing in on the half-price drink specials offered until 10:30 p.m. Free. 9 p.m.-2 a.m. Every Saturday. here lounge, 696 N. Robertson Blvd., W. Hlywd. www.tomwhitmanpresents.com

Bumpin’ the Night

Tune in to Indie 103.1 FM at midnight for Neon Noise with DJ Paul V. His weekly radio show features all the dirty electro, indie rock remixes and mashups you can shake a stick at. It's the next best thing to actually being at a club! www.myspace.com/smashmix

Sunday, June 24

Knock Down, Drag Out

Grab a stiff bevy, sidle up to the stage and prepare for the sequins and double-sided tape to fly as your favorite drag divas battle it out for $3,500 in cash prizes during the 18th cycle of Drag Idol. 10 p.m. Oasis, 1386 E. Foothill Blvd., Upland. www.oasis-nightclub.com

Cruise Control

Lookin’ for some action? Tonight’s hot spot is MJ’s, which hosts its Cruise T-Dance on Sundays from 5-9 p.m. DJ Quinn Callicott spins the best house music as loads of liquored-up hotties hit the dance floor. After 9 p.m., DJ Rick takes over, rewinding the party back to the crazy days of disco. 2810 Hyperion Ave., Silver Lake. www.mjsbar.com

Monday, June 25

Mondays are a Drag

Drop in to here lounge for Here’s Jackie!, the Monday night show featuring that sharp-tongued chanteuse Jackie Beat, who will have you rolling with her sassy shenanigans. Tonight, Jackie welcomes DJ Paul V. who will keep the party bumping. 696 N. Robertson Blvd., W. Hlywd. www.herelounge.com

Tuesday, June 26

Let the Good Times Roll

Tired of life in the fast lane? Check out WeHo Alt, an organization dedicated to offering LGBT folk an alternative to the bar scene where they can socialize, attend educational seminars and have a kick-ass time without a nasty hangover the next day. Tonight the organization is presenting a screening of Clueless, beginning at 8 p.m. 8235 Santa Monica Blvd., W. Hlywd. www.wehoalt.org